Monday Apr 03, 2023

How Alcoholism Almost Destroyed a Missionary Marriage


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Laura’s Lessons

  1. Learning to be okay with someone who is upset with me instead of trying to fix things. Learning that I couldn’t fix my marriage. I could do my work but I couldn’t do his. 
  2. I was realizing that I didn’t like who I was becoming and I wanted to change for myself, regardless of what he did. 
  3. My marriage was supposed to be a wonderful gift but it’s not a need. I came to the point where I realized that I would be okay whether he continued drinking forever or not. I just wasn’t going to continue with the abuse I was receiving. 
  4. I couldn’t change him so I worked on changing myself

Laura’s Advice and Encouragement

  1. Trust your gut. Most of the time, when you think they’re lying they probably are. 
  2. God sees everything. Your pain, your struggle, how hard you’ve fought for your marriage and, no matter what responses you get from family, friends, your church, or community, God sees and he knows. He is your support and he’s right there with you. 
  3. Even if your spouse never turns from their addiction, you have options. You have choices. You can improve your situation and still be the woman you want to be in it.
  4. Don’t stay isolated. Reach out to someone, even if it’s scary. Having a community of people who will support you is a must. You need a voice - other than your spouse’s -  about the situations that you’re in.


Register for Leslie's free, live webinar, "How long should you keep hoping for your destructive spouse to change and how will you know his change is real?" Click here to register: 

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